Questions.

It’s three in the morning and I can’t sleep. I have too many thoughts and questions going through my head right now to be able to focus on ANYTHING for more than 30 seconds.

Since I can’t sleep, and I can’t do anything else, why not try and remove the obstacle so that I can actually move on to do something productive?

1. Do I have it in me to graduate? I mean, I know I love economics and I know I can study the subject to a certain extent but do I really have the dedication and perseverance to stick it out?
2. Do I have it in me to lose weight? I know I’m swimming every morning, and I know I’m not eating as much junk food as I used to but I’m still not losing any weight. I feel fit, and much better about myself but I’d like to look the part as well. Why does it have to be so frustrating?
3. Will I ever be able to save up for a new phone? My current phone is totally bent out of shape and keeps hanging ever 5 minutes. I need a new phone, but without a job and meager allowance there isn’t any way that I can even bother to save.
4. Will I ever be in love again? I’ve been there, but I’ve always believed that true love only happens once in your life. Meh. I feel like I put such a sad spin on everything.
5. Will I ever have the courage and will power to break up with my current boyfriend? As amazing as he is, I really need to walk away. Enough is enough.
6. Are my dreams way out of my league? I was always taught to dream big and work towards achieving my goals but all of a sudden it all seems so unrealistic and out of my reach. Every time I think that I’ve moved forward, something or the other happens to make me take two steps back.
7. Will I ever be able to sustain myself so that I can FINALLY move out and live on my own BEFORE being forced to get married?
8. Will I ever be able to obtain the focus that I need? There’s a lot that I need to get done and fast. Procrastination is no longer an option. I need to make a plan and put it into action as soon as possible if I ever plan on getting things right in my life.

SOURCE: http://riptheseamsandwalkaway.tumblr.com/

Grown ups always tell you how wonderful life is going to be and how there are going to be so many opportunities for you to explore the world. What they always neglect to mention is that, regardless of whatever’s already out there, you’re going to have to work your butt off for anything and everything that you actually want. Even that’s not a full proof plan because life tends to be unfair.

What’s the point of it all?

Sorry if I’ve bummed you guys out. I just needed a place to rant and get all of this OUT of my system. It’s like Zeus vs. the Titans in my head right now. I’m all for looking at the glass as half full, but what if it’s got a leak and that it’ll probably be empty before you even realize that the glass was cracked?

Peeved.
E.K.